It is midafternoon on a Monday, usually a time when I am far done with my blog, but today was a holiday, and this week has been strange.
I was sick, unfortunately, pretty much all week. It was terrible and I have no desire to rehash it so let’s just call last week a wash and move on.
I came across a photo the other day, below. Me and Kevin, maybe four-years-old. I am sick and lying on the sofa, and he is sitting beside me, reading a book.
I don’t read much anymore because it is difficult for me, what with my eyes. I do more now than before I got new glasses, but without bifocals it’s still tricky. I have had two Stephen King’s sitting beside my bed for months that are unfinished.
And then today, Kevin gave me about fifteen more.
While downsizing his life, he decided to get rid of his King collection and gave it to me, which is awesome, but now means that A. I need more bookshelves, and B. My reading list has just expanded greatly. They’re all books I have yet to read, or have read once and didn’t have a copy of.
Anyway, this special delivery reminded me of that little picture of a sad and sick Briggy being soothed by the fake-reading of a four-year-old Kevvie. I was really sick this week, and I had a few plans with my bud that ended up having to be postponed because of it. If there is anything worse than the physical pain that comes with gastroparesis, there is the mental anguish of always feeling like you’re ruining something by getting sick. Every plan I have to cancel or rearrange haunts me. I hate it.
Today, I hate the whole damn thing.
But tomorrow, who knows…maybe I will make a space on my bookshelf. Maybe I will choose a new King novel to devour, hoping that it will get me back to the other two languishing on my nightstand. Maybe I will read something, and the words will seep into my eyeballs and though my pores and wind their way though my body, and I will be healed by a story or tale or poem…little healings, that keep me going.
Always gotta keep going.